The Main Event
Vegas got me thinking about boxing matches...
Basically two peeps step into a ring and try to beat the crap out of each other...
They train in different techniques and get all big so that they can knock the other senseless as fast as possible, hopefully to obtain some cash... but if they don't already have a good record or a huge fan following the cash prize is not really worth the possiblity of rendering your brain useless.
So... I propose the fight of the century.
One that will have an amazing amount of fan support and record sales...
One that will promise one of the opponents becoming even more useless then they began...
One that will involve more than just boxing fans...
One that will not ruin any careers any further...
That's right...
O.J. Simpson vs Michael Jackson
Of course we would have to involve Don King just to make things interesting,
You can just see it now...
Both of them used to be famous and have now nothing to lose... and a bit of cash in their pockets I'm sure wouldn't hurt. They both have people that still believe in them no matter how crazy they are or how horrible the crimes they are being acused of... and I am sure that there are just as many that would just enjoy watching one of them get there face smashed in.
Now in the blue corner we have an ex football great that used to run through 350 pound giants to get to the endzone. He has won tons of trophies over the years and has just recently been awarded a "not guilty" vote back in 1995 from a double murder case... I am sure that is his most prized trophy so far. He must still weigh over 220 pounds but I am not sure that he has the stamina or the shear power that he used to.
In the red corner we have the king of pop himself. Fast as lightning, this guy has the footwork down and will probably run circles (backwards) around any opponent. He is recently in court and has been labelled "wacko" many times.
I have a lot of questions concerning this fight:
- Will MJs face go all to mush, will it wipe off on OJs gloves, or will it hold strong like it is worth millions?
- Can OJ win without using some sort of weapon, and will he just deny that he won in the end anyways?
- Is the moonwalk fast enough to get away from an uppercut?
- Will MJ tag in Tito or Jermaine? Is that allowed?
- Will OJ have enough time to fit in the fight in his busy schedule?
- Can MJ hurt an opponent much bigger than the ones he is used to?
- Will the raiders cheerleaders show there support?
- Is it illegal to wear a sparkly glove underneath a boxing glove?
There are so many more but we just won't know the answers unless this fight goes down. I have watched many a boxing match and I can honestly say that if this was to happen, it wouldn't just be me that would be excited to watch it.
So lets all hope that MJ doesn't go to jail, but is left pennyless, and angry, and at that moment a little birdy should give him the idea to get into boxing... it would be great for the world... for at least a minute or so.
Lets get ready to RUMBLE!!!!
Slater
Basically two peeps step into a ring and try to beat the crap out of each other...
They train in different techniques and get all big so that they can knock the other senseless as fast as possible, hopefully to obtain some cash... but if they don't already have a good record or a huge fan following the cash prize is not really worth the possiblity of rendering your brain useless.
So... I propose the fight of the century.
One that will have an amazing amount of fan support and record sales...
One that will promise one of the opponents becoming even more useless then they began...
One that will involve more than just boxing fans...
One that will not ruin any careers any further...
That's right...
O.J. Simpson vs Michael Jackson
Of course we would have to involve Don King just to make things interesting,
You can just see it now...
Both of them used to be famous and have now nothing to lose... and a bit of cash in their pockets I'm sure wouldn't hurt. They both have people that still believe in them no matter how crazy they are or how horrible the crimes they are being acused of... and I am sure that there are just as many that would just enjoy watching one of them get there face smashed in.
Now in the blue corner we have an ex football great that used to run through 350 pound giants to get to the endzone. He has won tons of trophies over the years and has just recently been awarded a "not guilty" vote back in 1995 from a double murder case... I am sure that is his most prized trophy so far. He must still weigh over 220 pounds but I am not sure that he has the stamina or the shear power that he used to.
In the red corner we have the king of pop himself. Fast as lightning, this guy has the footwork down and will probably run circles (backwards) around any opponent. He is recently in court and has been labelled "wacko" many times.
I have a lot of questions concerning this fight:
- Will MJs face go all to mush, will it wipe off on OJs gloves, or will it hold strong like it is worth millions?
- Can OJ win without using some sort of weapon, and will he just deny that he won in the end anyways?
- Is the moonwalk fast enough to get away from an uppercut?
- Will MJ tag in Tito or Jermaine? Is that allowed?
- Will OJ have enough time to fit in the fight in his busy schedule?
- Can MJ hurt an opponent much bigger than the ones he is used to?
- Will the raiders cheerleaders show there support?
- Is it illegal to wear a sparkly glove underneath a boxing glove?
There are so many more but we just won't know the answers unless this fight goes down. I have watched many a boxing match and I can honestly say that if this was to happen, it wouldn't just be me that would be excited to watch it.
So lets all hope that MJ doesn't go to jail, but is left pennyless, and angry, and at that moment a little birdy should give him the idea to get into boxing... it would be great for the world... for at least a minute or so.
Lets get ready to RUMBLE!!!!
Slater
posted by OleWookie | 3:21 PM
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